These are tough times but we can emerge stronger than before.

| Dr Ilse Ruane

The current situation in which we find ourselves, with Covid-19, can be taxing on us as people. These are tough times but we can emerge stronger than before should we actively work towards achieving that. I have been asked by several clients over the lockdown weeks what are some of the things I have observed from this challenging time.   1. …

Building resilience in children despite COVID-19.

| Dr Ilse Ruane

The most important factor in building resilience in children and helping them process situations is to have loving adults who are there for them and who are physically, emotionally and spiritually available. Children rely on us to figure out how to interpret events. Unfortunately, we cannot protect our children from the consequences of COVID-19. However, the way we respond and the …

Children, Parents and divorce.

| Dr Ilse Ruane

The current divorce rate in South Africa ranges between 42%-50%. The main causes of divorce include financial difficulties, infidelity and breakdown in communication. Divorce often presents with additional challenges such as abusive behaviour, financial manipulation, non-payment of maintenance, dishonouring of promises with regard to contact with children, a controlling ex, using the children as pawns, legal issues, protection orders and …

Bullying

| Dr Ilse Ruane

We all have a mental image attached to the word bullying, but, in order to combat the real problem of bullying, we have to move beyond this simple definition. We need to be able to understand the difference between what bullying is and what it is not. As per definition, “bullying is a pattern of behaviour by a person or …

Communicating In Relationships

| Dr Ilse Ruane

The key to a sound and long-lasting relationship is communication. If you are to develop deep, strong relationships, you need to be able to share information about yourself and encourage your partner similarly to express him or herself. Good communication with a natural flow, consists of three essential skills: listening to what the other person is saying; expressing how you …

Bullying: Differences between boys and girls

| Dr Ilse Ruane

Methods of bullying tend to look different between the genders. Generally speaking, bullying is more common among boys. It can be harder to spot among girls, who are more likely to engage in relational aggression rather than physical aggression. Ruthless Boys Boys prefer the direct method of bullying face-to-face. They use their physical power over the victim in an attempt …

Anxiety

| Dr Ilse Ruane

Anxiety is a normal emotion and is experienced by all people at some stage. It is a normal part of growth; change, experiencing new and strange things, finding yourself and the meaning of your life. In contrast, pathological anxiety is an inappropriate reaction in terms of the intensity/duration when measured against the cause. What are the major kinds of anxiety? …

Anger Management

| Dr Ilse Ruane

Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems such as problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life. And it can make you feel as though you’re at the mercy of an unpredictable and powerful emotion. Anger …